Embrace It All

The heady scent of a rose

makes you forget its thorns

To sing in a raging storm

as we do when there's rain

is a joy very few can claim

Because

First, there's passion

Only then comes the pain

Who really wants pain?

Not you? Yeah. Not me either.

But it really doesn't matter what we want. Pain we have to bear, no matter what. Mankind has made a journey of millions of years but still, there's no surefire way around heartbreaks. 

The other day I was texting a friend and she was justifying her indifference to relationships. She told me she would rather remain single than expose herself to the possibility of a painful breakup. Now, on the face of it, it's a legit argument. I even chose to agree with her. But at the bottom of the matter is our inherent tendency to avoid something worthwhile for the fear of it failing us. Figuratively, that is similar to neglecting a rose for the fear of thorns.

It's true that in this modern era of people being happily "self-partnered", one would be a bit wary of the emotional baggage that comes with relationships. Life can feel like hell if the person you care for suddenly becomes a stranger. Modern science has even compared the pain of a broken heart with actual physical pain.

But isn't the idea of avoiding something as beautiful as love for protecting yourself from heartbreak a bleak one? Imagine meeting a person you really like and then turning them down because you think that they could hurt you if you invest yourself emotionally in them. Think of all the lovely evenings you're going to miss. Think of the person who is eager to reach out to you. In that case, you're not just avoiding a person, but you are saying no to a world of possibilities.

To me, all this fear and avoidance seems unnecessary. You don't have much control over the future anyway. So if the person seems right and you're in a favorable place in life, you should take the plunge. You never know, this one relationship might blossom into something promising.  If it goes well, it's a win-win and if it doesn't, it will only make you stronger. (Not quoting Joker here)

I'm not saying that you should actively put yourself in situations that end up in you or the other person getting hurt emotionally. That would be stupid and you're not stupid. All I'm saying is, you have to embrace everything that comes with a good, healthy relationship. If you consciously steer clear of emotions, you will only end up weak.

Always remember, nothing lasts forever. But every end has a new beginning, every cloud a silver lining. :)